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| I won one months free Karate at the Oceanside Dojo. I went to my first class today to check it out and it was soooo cool. The Sensei is a funny, laid back guy and the students seem friendly n chill. I am going to be taking my first class this Saturday and I am pumped to do it! I think that Karate is going to be my life changing activity.
When I read Shape magazine, They have these featured articles on women who have lost 60+ pounds and a lot of the time they will say it's because they got addicted to some sport or activity ! Maybe that activity will be Karate!
I told my parents where I am going to apply to. I didn't want to, but they asked. I know itssilly but I think that it may jinx me or if I don't get in to UCI or UCR they will see it as I failed or something...
But I know that I can only do the best that I can do. I just have to try my best and hope for the best.
I hope I'm not getting sick... I can't afford to get sick right now. X_x
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| Man, I am such a worry wart. I know I'm a worry wart. I worry over things that I don't need to worry over or have nothing to do with me! It doesn't make any sense. But still, these worries keep me up at night. So I'm writing them down in hopes that I can go to sleep before 2am this time.
I'm terrified of not being able to transfer next year. So many horror stories of failed transfers because of budget cuts....I can apply for transfer for CSU's as of today! And for UC's in November. I am SO excited but SO scared. I mean, what if I don't get in??? But everyone says I should be fine because I have a 3.5GPA and stuff. I truly hope so. I want to transfer into UCI so badly, and if not there, then UCR. I have ALWAYS wanted to go to a UC since I was a little kid. And I hope I can make it happen.
Babies. Marriage. My friends are getting married (already have) and another set of friends is having twins. I can't get this shit out of my head. The idea of being married and having KIDS are blowing my mind. I mean, Doug and I won't be doing those things for a few years (until I graduate and we have great jobs) but just the IDEA of having kids is keeping me from sleeping. How in the world would I raise them??? But its stupid for me to worry about that because that's not an issue for me. I wonder if its normal for people my age to worry about shit like this.
My 6 year anniversary with Doug is coming up on Oct 10th. SIX years. I can't believe its been that long. I really can't.We forgot our anniversary last year (LOL!). I can't believe 6 years has passed already. I have no idea what to get him. LOL
What else...what else...oh! What about finding a place and getting a job to whatever new school I end up in?? Gosh that frightens me too...I'm just so worried about these things that have no place in my mind right now.
I'm such a damn worry wart.
I have a goal to lose 30 pounds by 2010. I think I can do it if I work out and eat right. I can imagine the new me already. I'm excited to get there.
I know my future is bright, I just wish that it were here already!
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| Lately I have been feeling sooooo stressed out! And Doug told me why... I am doing 12 hour days! I go to school Mon thru Thursday from 8-12 and then I have work from 1:30-7!! Between work n school, I am eating or driving to my next destination! Then when I come home I have to do homework or study. I need to fit in workouts too. Is it even possible for me to manage it all???
Wednesday n Fridays are the weird days. Wednesday I have class till 4 but no work and Fri I have class until 9am but have work sometimes. Those days are like my catchup or me days... But it's not enough.
I guess so... But I am so tired n stressed ready and this is only week four/five of school!!!
Today is Dougs birthday a nd we are going to go out to eat.
I need to pull it together because right now I am running myself into the ground . Doug thinks I should limit my availability at work so I can have more me time. I am starting to think that it's a good idea.... I could really use it for my sanity. But I make so little as it is. Can I afford the luxury of more days off?
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| So the Biggest Loser season started yesterday and it was fantastic! But listening to their stories really cut deep for me because I'm fat because of my past and inability to find time to do things for ME.
How many blogs have I written about wanting to change and workout? Or how I have started working out and am eating healthy? Only there is a follow up blog about how I got too busy and fell off the horse, but that I would pick up where I left off "soon". Hah.
If I got a penny for every blog I did regarding those topics...Let's just say I'd be a rich chick.
I want to start my healthy life but it would be so hard with my schedule. I either would have to work out in the late evening(when I do homework) or early in the morning before class(5:30am). Hah.
I gotta figure something out because I want to start LIVING my life.
This idea has been bothering me for several weeks..but it's time for a change. I have to do it for me. I have to make time for me.
Because I'm worth it and I deserve it!
I want to show the world who I am on the outside, not just on the inside. | | |
| Well, I have 5 tests next week. The first 4 tests occurring within the first 3 days. Blah. I really really REALLY have to study this weekend. I have so many chapters to study for each class. x_x I guess its a good thing that I know myself so well, because I saw that all of my tests for the entire semester were grouped together and took off the days off prior to the tests to study.
Because if I know me (which I do xD), I will procrasinate and do what I have to do to survive with my sanity for the semester while taking 20 units. =P So for each group of tests I've taken the previous 3 days off (if there is a lot of tests at once) or 1 day off (if there is only a single test). xD
Thank goodness I finally got it right for once, because the previous two semesters I just went with the flow and while I did well in the class, I sorta got lucky. I mean, I would have been REALLY screwed if my brain decided it didn't want to memorize anything. >_>
So no mistakes this time around. =P I put in my days off for the ENTIRE semester as soon as classes started two weeks ago. LOL =P
So I have Saturday,Sunday and Monday off to study for all of my tests. Well, on Sunday we have a mandatory ALL STAFF YMCA Quarterly meeting. Every department will be there and we'll probably do excercises in which we get to know each other, review our CPR/First Aid, etc etc. =P Oh well tho. Its only 2 hours.
I really REALLY want to get healthy. But dammit, I'm so busy. Between work, school, family and homework...there is hardly any time! But I REALLY want this. I HAVE to do this. For me.
So I'm going to try to start this weekend. By working out a bit here and there and trying to eat healthier.
I have a lot that I want to accomplish and, one day, I will do it all. I just have to stay focused and keep my eyes on the prize. =)
In the meantime, I just have to find the balance in my life. Arete.
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